Welcome to Friday Feedback, a formerly-weekly and now sporadic feature of the blog in which I post and comment upon reader reactions to my work.
It’s been a while since I did this, but my mailbox has been bursting since I began writing the series, “Anatomy of a Disaster.”
In case you have been trapped under something heavy and unable to read that series, please click the links below to catch up. I’ll wait here for you.
Let’s look at some critique, shall we?
Mean Girl Doesn’t Realize I Have No Fucks to Give
First up is someone who thought I was writing about their case when in fact I was not.
This was a misunderstanding created in part inadvertently by me (I won’t go into how because it’s boring) but mostly by the writer’s former DICKs.
The DICKs review everything I post online, and they do so not just by checking in from time to time like an ordinary person, but by constant monitoring. Think of it like a film instead of a photograph.
What that means is if I post something anywhere and then immediately remove it, they have a record of it to send to their tall and adorable lawyer Steve* so they can ask him for the millionth time:
Isn’t THIS defamation?
Anyhoo, they grabbed something I posted extremely briefly on Facebook and sent it to their former client.
Why? That’s a really good question.
Then again, I can’t for the life of me figure out why they do anything they do.
Mean Girl sent me this message via Facebook:
Oh man. I think you need to watch it. We have a lot of mutual friends and I’ll be in quick convo with every single one of them about what you’re up to. It looks to me like someone who should be more careful. BIG FAN.
She went on to name some people she identified as “mutual friends” (who in reality are merely mutual friends on Facebook) and threatened to call them up and tell them not to like me.
In other words, she was going to organize a social junta against me: a posse of Portland people procreated to purposely propel my unpopularity, pronto.
I guess she didn’t get the memo that I don’t move in social circles or give two shits about what these people think. I also can’t be intimidated by threats of making me some sort of social pariah, because I revel in the real and meaningful friendships I have with individuals, not packs of hyenas.
This was all based on a stupid misunderstanding and by the end of several very terse and sometimes funny message exchanges I think we understood each other and parted on amicable terms.
Either that or she’s planning to kill me.
Hard to tell.
Speaking of death threats, real or imagined:
Samantha Reaches Out!
I received some comments on the “Anatomy of a Disaster” series that
clearly came I believe came from Samantha.** (READERS: please be sure to go to the end for an update)
Apply “sic” to all of the following:
Most writers will put up both TRUE sides of the story, sounds to me that the woman writing this book thinks the world revolves around her, I haven’t seen someone so involved in her own accomplishments, I’m sorry but the Reaper spares no-one, at least that is what my attorney Larry Wobrock has told me,
And then came this:
I believe Sarah has her own problems, there is certainly not “perfect people” as she is being put into the light as a wounded duck, she knew yrs into this relationship, was even supporting at one time, how long was the first pregnancy as to the marriage? My question is did Sam feel like she had to do the “right thing?” By Sarah? That would be a sort of entrapment.
I’ll address Samantha and her complaints in a numbered fashion.
1. It is hardly uncommon for writers to tell a story from one side. Have you ever heard the terms “biography” or “autobiography” or “historical” or any number of other descriptions of books?
2. While you are looking up those terms, please look up the words “book” and “blog,” for they are very different. Of course, if someone wants me to make this into a full-blown book I certainly will.
3. How exactly do you surmise I think the world revolves around me? I’m very curious so please explain. We live in the same neighborhood so perhaps we can meet for coffee.
4. While we are there you can also tell me why someone who writes a blog and is finishing a book while working on radio deals is “so involved in her own accomplishments.” Part of this blog is an autobiographical account of how I moved from a career I hated to something I love.
My readers like to stay informed on what’s going on with that change. Certainly you like to read the blog, as do your attorneys. ALL 11 OF THEM.
5. The Reaper indeed will come knocking some day, hopefully not before I finish all I plan to accomplish (and write about, just to annoy you). Is that a threat? Because I am pretty good at defending myself.
6. You spelled “your” attorney’s name wrong. Also, I doubt he is your attorney since he is retired. He’s a friend of Mr. Patience and Understanding and a great guy. I’m not sure why you name-checked him here but perhaps you can explain when we meet for coffee.
7. Speaking of attorneys, who are you using in your discrimination case against your former employer? I have some names if you don’t like your current counsel. Since you sent me a LinkedIn request yesterday, you can see that I am very familiar with your former employer and their employment practices. Small world, no?
8. Everyone has problems and Sarah is not being portrayed as “perfect.” As for whether she is being portrayed as a “wounded duck,” I’d say no. A wounded person? Well, the divorce did wound her, but I think she is going to have an amazing Act Two and heal those wounds very quickly. You? I’m not so sure.
9. The writing I’ve done clearly shows Sarah both knew about the issue and tried to be supportive by staying in the marriage. So what’s your point, exactly? That she should have stayed with you forever, despite your need to transition? Because as I stated in the last installment of this series:
… a man having and retaining his dick and not wanting breast implants is a non-negotiable for most women in a marriage. A woman having and retaining her tits, and not wanting to have an addadicktome operation is also a non-starter for most men.
10. Your insinuation that Sarah trapped you into marriage by becoming pregnant is reprehensible and beneath you.
Let’s dive into that one a little further:
- Your son, whom you have effectively just labeled a near-bastard and a tool of deception, was born 9 months and 1 week after your wedding which had been planned for some time. Your math skills are as tenuous as your writing skills.
- I don’t think Sam or Samantha has ever felt he/she had to do the right thing by anyone except himself/herself. In this instance, your point is moot because of, well, math. If you want to truly be a woman you may want to familiarize yourself with some of the basics, like the 40 weeks of gestation rule.
- “Entrapment?” Are you joking? First, she wasn’t pregnant when you proposed marriage. Second, she wasn’t pregnant when you married, and even if she had been, it would have been by just a few days and therefore entrapment is impossible. Third, while you may identify as a woman you certainly still think like a sexist male chauvinist pig. Or do you think preventing pregnancy is solely the responsibility of the woman? As a woman, I am hereby kicking you out of the “enlightened females” club until you can learn the basics of gender equality.
- You have complained your children may see this blog and become upset by it, even though teenagers aren’t exactly my demographic and even though I am not using your real names. It’s odd to me you would make such an outrageous and false claim on that same blog. Or don’t you care about your children’s feelings?
- I’ve read several emails written by you and your comments, especially this one, are written in the same style. While I abhor your ignorance about how the female body makes a baby and your sexism, I will give you this: You have absolutely nailed the “Bitch” aspect of womanhood. So at least you’ve got that going for you, which is nice.
- Most importantly, your belief that you were trapped into marriage by pregnancy shows that you do not live and operate within the realm of reality. This explains a good deal about why this case became the disaster it is. If we add up your refusal to see things as they were and are, along with your choice of counsel, this case could never be anything but a shit show of epic proportions.
I hope all of you have a wonderful weekend. Next week’s blogging may be sporadic, as I’ll be writing from an undisclosed location where there are parties and golf courses and sunshine to be had. Your favorite blogger needs a break!