Friday Feedback: You’re So Vain (you probably think this blog is about you)

Dear Readers:

Welcome to Friday Feedback, our weekly review of the report card delivered unto us by our fans and sworn enemies.  Let’s get right to it, shall we?

(the following was submitted anonymously through my contact page)

“Did you get the Sex on Schedule question from (redacted)?  If so I have a bone to pick with the writer.”

Dear Friend:

It’s kind of silly to submit an anonymous question when you are clearly asking me if this letter came from your husband.

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I hope you don’t work for the NSA.

I will not reveal who writes to me so don’t waste your time asking.  In fact, most days I am pretty sure I’m dealing with fake names and email addresses so even if I were ordered by a court to give up the identity of a letter writer, I couldn’t.  

The only time I was certain the email address was genuine was when I received the following: 

“Robin, I have been struggling with hair loss and crippling impotence for several years, which may or may not be related to my tanning bed and hairspray addictions.  I hork my phlegmy conspiracy theories regularly on Twitter and I am obsessed with Obama because I know his cock is bigger than mine.  

Some people think I am not handsome and my financial wizardry and business prowess have been called into question.

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Also, Scotland is considering reinstitution of the death penalty and they have named the bill ‘When We Prosecute Trump for What He Did to Balmedie.’  What should I do? “

Donald@Trump.com

To which I replied:

“Just kill yourself, already.  And by the way, your latest mail order bride is fucking the pool boy at Mar-A-Lago.” 

Look, folks, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I will not reveal who writes to me so don’t waste your time asking.  

Readers, this is the umpteenth time I have gotten this question or one similar to it (did you write that blog about me?).  The answer is probably NO, although it is possible some readers recognize themselves in a post.  STOP ASKING! 

trumpdumplo

Dear Robin:

I almost always agree with the advice you give, 90-95% of the time, but not regarding the man who wanted to tell his kids about their mom’s affair with the stepdad.  I think kids have a right to know just what happened to their family.  Anyway, love the blog so keep it up and good luck with the radio show! 

-Ted

Dear Ted:

We can agree to disagree on my advice regarding Should I Tell My Kids?  And thank you for your patronage!

Given my stats with you, I’d say I’m doing pretty well.

IgUGAde

You must be one hell of a smart fellow, with the exception of your opinion about how I handled this letter.  Trashing your kids’ mom and divulging personal and private information about her is never a good idea.

Also, I’m sorry your wife cheated on you.  Have a nice weekend and keep your mouth shut!

-Robin

Dear Robin:

Kudos on your blog.  I’ve never seen a more delightful blend of intelligence, humor, and chutzpah.  May you be granted your wish to connect with Howard Stern and thereby become the blogosphere’s Next Big Thing.

I had tears in my eyes all the way through your latest missive about the ex-spouse.  I haven’t laughed that hard in a long time.  The situation was a mirror image of my divorce.  It was wrenching at the time, but this many years later there are parts of it that are truly hilarious. My ex-wife has steadfastly refused any attempts at rapprochement, even for the sake of the kids.

Too bad – I gave up trying long ago – but to this day she ties herself in knots to avoid even the slightest visual or physical contact at the rare family doings.  Anyway, I’ve loved taking the high road all these years, watching her wallow in the mud.  I just wish I’d had your sage advice when I was going through the process.

-Dan

Thank you for your letter in response to My Ex Hates Me.  I know several people in your position and I truly just don’t get it.  These ex-spouses are people who are good parents and who say they would do anything for their kids, but if you can’t be nice to the other parent for the sake of your children, those words are just happy horse shit.

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I hope all of you have a wonderful weekend.  As usual, I am shamelessly begging for you to share the blog and encourage people to subscribe via email.

There are some really interesting developments happening and momentum growing, including another appearance in Palm Springs later this month and conversations with important media people.

I can’t divulge details yet except to say that I need to continue to grow the blog as these new opportunities arise.  Please help me.

If all of you took a moment to post my blog on your social media platforms, I could increase readership in a major way.  Even if you are hate-reading my blog* you could share it with some friends and demonstrate just how awful I am.

Everyone who does this will be invited to the big party and golf tournament in August at Portland Golf Club to celebrate the signing of my radio deal contract.**

Pardon the shameless begging, but those of you who know me know I would do it for you.  Can you help a sister out?

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Happy Friday, everyone!  Be sure to tune in Monday, when I answer a reader who asks: should I follow through with the flirtation and let myself have an affair with a married man?

The answer may surprise you.  It’s going to be a good one, so don’t miss it.  Love to you all, even the haters!

-Robin

*I know you are, just admit it
**This is a promise, unless there is no contract, in which case I’ll buy you all a beer at my summer keg party

 

This Post Has One Comment

  1. Linda Chance (@angeltweets4u)

    Robin: Really enjoy your blog. I would love to work with you on your social media campaigns. I will DM you my info on Twitter. Have a great weekend!

Comments are closed.