Welcome to Friday Feedback, our used-to-be-weekly-but-now-sporadic amending of the blog soil with the fertilizer of reader analysis.
I’ve received some fascinating comments on my work recently!
I was absolutely thrilled to receive a follow-up email from someone who wrote to me about eight months ago for advice. His wife had essentially been cheating on him for over a decade with her computer. You can read all about it here: Computer Addiction is Ruining My Marriage.
Robin, I’ve been following your blog and when I saw your post on Tuesday I knew I had to write. I had that tough talk with my wife and as I feared, she essentially ignored me. We are in the process of divorce and she hired a lawyer who is making my life miserable but all I know is that I can finally see that my life has a better outlook now than it has in many years. I wish we could have used you as a mediator but we live far from Portland. Anyway, thank you.
Hearing from happy customers is one of the many highlights of my career, otherwise known as my “quixotic journey to hell.” If you’ve been featured in the blog please write to me and let me know how things have progressed (if you took my advice) or devolved (if you did not).
Side note on the mediation business:
I am currently putting together all the needed paperwork but I am absolutely up and running. I am not limited to doing this solely in Oregon so if you don’t live here and you want to save many tens of thousands of dollars on your divorce, please email me at: firstname.lastname@example.org.
Next we have this message I received regarding Pressure to Donate, a two-part blog in which I addressed the pressure felt by a woman whose former divorce lawyer was strong-arming her into making donations to suspect “charities.”
My lawyer put intense pressure on me to donate to all sorts of things including her relative’s political campaign!!! I read your blogs and gagged because I know EXACTLY how this feels. It really does feel like extortion because of everything she knew about me. Hiring her was the biggest mistake I ever made. I wish I had your magic Robin DesCamp time machine so I could choose someone else. This was a great blog and I’ve shared it with others who have felt the same way about the fake charities and social scene climbing charities she put pressure on all of us to give to.
This reader does not care for my language or much of anything else about me:
You have a filthy blog. Someone should have washed you’re (sic) mouth out with soap and given you a good hard spanking a long time ago. You are a disgusting embarrasment (sic) to your family, your profession, your friends, and your city.
I saw the photo you posted in your bathing suit and that was disgusting too. You are a middle-aged woman what were you thinking? You’re (sic) poor son. Good luck with that mediation business because nobody is going to hire you with the things you put on line (sic).
You can’t make all the readers happy all the time, but since I am trying to be a better person every day, I wrote back to “Disgusted.” Here was our exchange:
“What level of schooling did you achieve, and what’s with your aversion to spellcheck? Low-hanging fruit out of the way, I’m curious how you know I am an embarrassment to my family and friends. Are you one of them? If so, this wasn’t a very nice email.”
“I’d literally rather die than be friends with you and thank God I am not in you’re (sic) family.”
“‘Literally?’ My goodness, I’ve had critics before, but none who’d rather actually die than have cocktails with me. I think you meant ‘figuratively.’ Don’t feel bad about it though, a lot of feeble-minded two-legged stool samples make that mistake. You seem to think you’re (please note proper usage) better than me. Is that a good assessment of our current relationship?”
“Robin, everyone is better than you. For your information I may make stupid typos but I am much smarter and more successful than you could ever dream of and even though I’m not disgusting enough to put bathing suit photos of myself on line (sic), I look a hell of a lot better than you. I’m done with this conversation because you are an idiot.”
“I try to be optimistic about winning people over, but I fear you may be immune to my charms. This distressing situation has caused me much pain and I’m not sure I can find the strength to go on. Happily, should I decide to end it all I’ve come up with a great plan:
“I’m going to figure out who you are and come find you. Then, I’ll scale your massive ego and leap to your IQ.
“By the way, your obsession with my body and your comment about washing my mouth out with soap and my needing a spanking showed me two things:
- If you managed to drug someone long enough to procreate you almost certainly abused your children; and
- You clearly want to fuck me. While that isn’t going to happen, I am happy to provide you with some masturbatory material:
Last but not least, my Biggest Fan did not find my response to her bar complaint against me nearly as entertaining as I, and the millions of others who read it and figuratively died from both laughter and deep thoughts.
She wrote the following to the bar:
I received your communication today regarding the DesCamp response and just finished reading through it for my first time. I am dumbstruck by her response and complete lack of discretion and sensitivity to this matter. I will let you know within the week whether or not I will even bother trying to respond to her incoherent response. I am not even sure it would be possible to be honest.
If Complainant was truly dumbstruck by my response, she may not be my Biggest Fan after all. She must not have read my first bar response.
If a person with questionable intelligence is “dumbstruck,” do they then enjoy a new and much higher IQ, much as a negative multiplied by a negative equals a positive?
As for my “lack of discretion,” I did not post my response online or use her name in it.
Regarding my “sensitivity” to her: she accused me of both criminal and unethical conduct and provided evidence that proved the opposite of those accusations.
Pardon my French (“Disgusted” will be even more so today) but in what fucking universe should anyone be owed sensitivity when they try to have someone punished for something they did not do? Samantha blames me for every single problem in her life – no joke – and yet I am supposed to treat her with kid gloves.
It’s that sort of reasoning that explains why she is an unemployed, miserable, lonely and wretched person estranged from her own children. She surrounds herself with like-minded people who encourage her narcissism and victim-mentality while simultaneously squeezing blood money out of the rock that is her bank account.
Say what you want about me, Samantha, but here’s the thing: my divorce was easy, I spent less than 1% of what you have so far, I have a great relationship with my son’s dad, and my kid thinks I’m pretty awesome. So maybe I’ve got some ideas that make sense?
“Incoherent?” I don’t think so. I’ve been accused of being many things, but with the exception of that time I experimented with combining tequila, Xanax, and high-THC edibles, “incoherence” isn’t one of them.
As for responding to my response, Complainant writes:
“I am not even sure it would be possible to be honest.”
That’s not surprising, because I easily blew away every single allegation she made. It was like taking candy from a very stupid and drunk baby.
As for that stupid drunk baby’s sentence above, her Freudian slip is showing. Not sure what I mean? Read it again and leave a comment.